Thirty Days

A project made in 2017 for the Bulgarian SVEMA magazine. Self-portraits every day for 30 days, meditations on the topic of connecting to my body.

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The connection to the body is a dotted line. A secret you keep from yourself. That’s why it’s easy not to think about it. For you, the self-portrait becomes a revolution - there is nothing natural about this gaze. The proportions get all wrong. The piece of paper is, in your eyes, never big enough or small enough.
You’re not looking for the body in pain, the body that seduces or the one that sleeps. Only for the body that is. That you are.

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For a second I’m disoriented by the question “Why am I so fixated at my neck?”. And then I realize the answer - I’m looking for the connection to my body.

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This broken connection is visible in how I can’t simply draw/feel my body, but I also need to write/think about my body. Both those things together.

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I draw myself in awkward poses so that I can watch myself; at the end of the process I see red bruises everywhere; the spots I was most careless with bloom into blue a few days later.